Purging & Acquisition: Last Lap

Getting back on the airplane to Frankfurt after our whirlwind tour of home we were exhausted and laden with luggage.  We came with 2 pieces (one suitcase held another suitcase inside) and left with 4 jumbo bags plus our abundantly plump carry-ons.

Leaving Canada with our stuff was easy, making our train connection in Frankfurt was going to be a synchronized weight lifting event.  Here is a tip:  When travelling by train in Europe, if the schedule states that it is leaving at 15:22 then it is leaving at 15:22. As well the train may only stop for about 3 or 4 minutes before it carries on out of the station.

I worked out with the girls who was going to get on first, who was going to be on the receiving end of me hoisting/pitching/dragging the bags into the train. Then we would negotiate where we would park the bags once on board.

Also, fun fact, I'm not a stranger to packing a well stocked bag and am usually in awe at those around me who get onto the train or check in at the airport with their Barbie size suitcase for a 3 week holiday.  Now I'm not opposed to the concept that you can always pick up what you need there, yeah that is never a problem.  The image of me and my girls with 4 large suitcases, 3 large carry-ons and purses, I believe made many an observer shake their head at us.

We were successful, we were exhausted, we were trying not to be lulled to sleep by the train as we had a station change in short order............Once back to our quaint little cottage, now feeling like it was bulging at the seams with our luggage our shoulders instantly relieved being back in our home.

Over the next few months we continued to cultivate our lives, our friendships, our connections and penchant to cover as much of Europe as possible, all the while knowing that our time in Deutschland and Nederland may be soon coming to an end.



Returning to Europe and back to the now familiar sights, sounds, languages and vibe.  We had been Blessed from the moment we first landed that we were welcomed and it felt like Home.  

Sure we hacked our way through the language, and that continued throughout our time, but very rarely did it feel "foreign" to be there, Germany and The Netherlands were exceptional Hosts.

Not all expats have this experience and I viewed this as a tremendous gift. 

The one thing that expats all have in common is having to say "good bye".

Practicing what I post.

Living abroad we can find ourselves at times missing certain comforts from home, such as food.  These things can be appeased by either requesting a care package or being creative in the kitchen, our feeling of missing can be satisfied for the time being.

When we miss family or friends, that too can be handled quite easily with an email, skype call or any number of online options.  However, no matter how far technology has come when we miss that special person that is beyond this world, there is a palpable void.

Special occasions like birthdays, Christmas and other calendar dates bring up those feelings and in some ways we can be some what prepared for those times, since we know they are coming up.  Its the times, when no matter where in the world you are, that on a Thursday, for no accountable reason, you feel as though you have been swallowed up and the feelings of loss have enveloped you.

As an adult I can and do practise what I posted in the Rock Star or Roadie blog and through that can navigate my way through the funk.  As a Mom, my instincts want me to just tuck my girls away, hug them, hold them and fix things.  

But I can't.

No amount of hugs from me can replace the arms that they wish to hold them.

Listening to me can not replace the voice that they wish to hear.

A Mom can do and be many things for their children; but a Mom can never be their Dad.

I can only love them, hug them, help them as a Mom.

I can be a "go to" person for them.

I can breathe deeply & evenly, and encourage the same.

I can listen and through that feel the heaviness of the funk lighten.

We can talk and acknowledge that these heavy feelings are temporary and know that they aren't always this strong.

We can sort through some choices and auxiliary experiences, created during this time, that may have best been put on pause, but learn from them all the same.

I can and do remind them of their Rock Stardom; we can smile, laugh, and feel even more heaviness dissipate.

Reaching out to someone when you need a "go to" can seem like the most difficult step; 

Reaching in to someone when they need a "go to" can seem equally so. 

To keep connected during these times takes willingness and faith on both parts.

The email, phone call or invitation for a walk may be the opening up to helping yourself or another feel lighter and better able to make their way back on stage.

Feeling like a Rock Star or the Roadie?

Where is your vibeage right now?


You know the Rock Star feeling, when everything you've got going on is going on!  You are hitting every note and are working through everything with relative ease!  Daily you take to the stage of your life and no matter what comes your way...bam... you have it handled.  No question, No hesitation, you have the "I Got This" attitude.


Have you ever felt like the Roadie?  When everything you are doing feels like heavy lifting, tripping over the cords, constantly stepping on the sticky patches of spilled coke?  When you face the day with the attitude of, "Geez I hope ________ doesn't happen", or I forgot to (fill in the blank) and you are always in catch up or clean up mode.  Not an awesome place to be.


Someone responded to my Rock Star question with, "I don't even feel like I'm on the tour"...so now what?"


My response to the query above was "What would it feel like to coast?"  Think intermission - a time out, a pee break, a chance to get a drink, buy a t-shirt or whatever.  Consider this as an opportunity to take a pause.


When you are in a funk what can you do?


1.  Acknowledge- Be gentle with yourself knowing this is temporary.                            


2.  Mental Sorting - Take the opportunity to see what is coming up for you. What is occupying your mind that has you confounded.  Grab a journal and write. 


3.  Decide not to decide - There are things that will have to be handled and do so; if there are auxiliary things that you could delay making decisions on do so until you are back in the zone.  


4.  Keep connected - Enlist the help of your support network, talk it out with your go to person(s) and share the load.  Your circle of support would not want you to carry that heavy load alone.  Reach out.


5.  Keep moving - February is a month whereas we are still in winter, the sun is graduating towards spring, and the weather can't seem to decide what to do.  Go for a refreshing walk, grab your Ipod, your friend, or pet and get some fresh air.


6.  Breathe & Belly Laugh - I realize you are breathing but stale, stagnant air can accumulate and hangs out in our lungs as it can in our homes.  Pop in your favorite comedy movie and watch and laugh, find a friend to have fun with and laugh!  Find a Laughter Yoga class and even if you don't feel like giggling the benefits of this type of yoga is amazing. 


Not feeling solid or balanced can be reflected in the body as in the mind.  Make a list of 5 things that help you feel more centered, perhaps one or more are listed above.  If not seek to discover what those things are in you, for when a funk happens you have your own personal toolkit to get through to the other side, refreshed and ready for your close up!


Rock On!!!