Breaking Up With my PC

Break ups are hard.  
Break ups are not fun.
Break ups may be a necessity in letting go.

This may seem melodramatic but I need to find the courage to be the one to break up, with my laptop.

You see I was generously gifted a new MacBook Pro for my birthday in December and I have hardly given any attention to it.  

I've taken advantage of the support offered from Apple to learn how to migrate to the new platform, taken three different classes to learn how to navigate and still I'm typing this post on my well loved PC.

One of the geniuses at the Apple store made a comment that has stuck with me over the last month.  They said "The biggest challenge for those switching from PC to Mac is fear, being afraid of making mistakes."

  

I gulped back my desire to scoff at that remark and say, "What me afraid to make mistakes?  To take a risk trying something unfamiliar?  Not me....ugh"

But here I am on my Acer, comfortably typing, backspacing, scrolling with such unconscious familiarity while my shiny new MacBook lays in wait.

My PC laptop is old in technology years and has served me and my girls well.  Honestly, I've been saying for months that I need to shop for a new one.  It has a habit of pausing aka freezing amid multiple keystrokes and I hold my breath hoping it recovers and all that I had been working on is still in tact.

My laptop is the size of a refrigerator compared to my MacBook.  It's keyboard is bigger, which makes typing on the MacBook frustrating because I have to look at where I put my hands.  (First world problem)

My MacBook is like a bigger version of my Iphone.  No loss of contacts.  No concern about all my music. No repopulating my calendar.  Poof I simply signed into my Itunes account and magically everything was there.  No stress.  (I may have murmured showoff under my breath when that happened within 5 minutes of turning it on)

Then there is the Mac software that tries to pretend its MSOffice.  You mean to tell me that I don't need tabs of document formatting options that I very rarely use?  Don't even get me started on comparing spreadsheet software, Excel versus Numbers.  You are telling me I can not use complicated formulas that I used to use all the time?  (harumphing Amateur even while knowing I can buy MSOffice for Mac)

I realize that this may seem all very over the top.  I get that.  Converting from PC to Mac is like switching religions, there is an ingrained trust and tradition that has been built up over the years.  Being so intimately familiar with what to expect when I turn on my PC then waiting, waiting, waiting for it to fire up is just the delayed reaction procedure so I can have a couple sips of coffee.  Versus opening up my Mac and like a dog who heard you said "walk" its ready to sign in.  

Truthfully, I wish my laptop had simply froze and didn't recover; then the conversion would be easier, I'd feel less disloyal, I'd feel justified, I'd feel free to switch teams and never look back.  Yet I'm grateful that my laptop did not die, I'm grateful that I didn't have that stress of calling 911 or perform CPR so that I could get all of my files off of it.

Despite the evidence I've just shown you and confirmed for myself by writing out the differences.  I find that my resistance calls for something with more finality. Hence, the break up.

I've admitted that I am attached to my PC.  

I will admit that I'm attracted to the sexy new Mac, and when I do use it I feel like I'm cheating on my Acer.  UGH

I have to let go of my relationship with the old and embrace being romanced by the new laptop.  

Admittedly this is a bit foreign to me.  I've a longstanding reputation of being able to let go of physical things with peace, love and gratitude.  Why this situation feels different, while inherently I know there is no difference between this piece of electronics than the upteen bags of clothes, furniture, other things I've let go in the past.

So what is stopping me from moving forward?

Well I have to also admit that the Apple Genius was right.  I'm fearful of making mistakes on the new Mac, I'm a little resentful that I have to relearn what I already know by rote, I'm a wee bit sad that I no longer have to navigate circular referenced formulae in Excel.  I've changed, my computer needs have changed, and this change has me resisting.

And this was a great lesson for me.  

On Monday I had a One to One session booked to help to get to know my Mac even better.  The Apple Genius slash therapist, listened as I spoke about my resistance, he kept using phrases like "Let's do it this way to lessen your stress".  

In 60 minutes I had brought over a good chunk of my files and admittedly was  more confident in committing to my Mac.  His understanding helped, his sales pitch on why I will learn to love the Mac was valuable, his support and guidance has me typing the balance of this post on my new shiny laptop, in pages versus Word, whilst my PC lays dormant beside me.

I've not discarded my PC, there are plenty more files that I need to transfer over, however that session with the Genius helped me move away from the default.  Move away from the fear.  And moved me toward gratitude.

I'm grateful for the service my Acer provided.  I'm super grateful that it is still alive, well and functional.  My gratitude has superimposed that feeling of disloyalty.  Thanks to taking the step to learn more about my mac and actually bring my files over, that was the clean break I needed to let go.

I've accepted that this change is not only necessary but I've created the space within and welcomed it.  

Just like any break up, its hard to admit that the relationship isn't working anymore.  There is still that sense of mourning the loss of all the good times.  There is that feeling of fondness for how the relationship added value to my life.  However I do know that its time to let go and it feels better to do so in order to devote my attention to my new relationship.  

Mac sitting atop the PC :)

With Gratitude,
Sherry

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Self Love Bagua

In spirit of Valentine's Day I created an inquiry based Bagua for Self Love, asking how Self Love would affect the relationship to all of life areas on the bagua.

The Love and Relationships gua in Feng Shui encompasses all of the relationships in your life.  

You would find this area in your home by dividing your main floor into 9 equal areas, stand facing your front door and it would be at the back of your house the area to the right.

You can also lay the bagua onto each room to find where Love and Relationships would be anchored as it also has its own 9 areas.  Divide the space into 9 equal blocks, stand facing the door or entry of the room.

--------------Entrance or Front Door--------------

Relationships are not limited interpersonal, it includes all relationships starting with you and your relationship with your:  

• spouse
• children
• family
• friends
• colleagues
• career
• car
• education
• life experiences
• the world
• health
• body
• money
• spirit
• yourself
• etc.

You may have heard me ask/say this before, but it bears repeating.

1. If you were to list 5 people who LOVE YOU unconditionally who would they be?
2. If you were to list 5 people who YOU LOVE unconditionally who would they be?
3. Did you include yourself on either or both of those lists?

Self Love is not about narcissism, nor is it about ego.  Self Love is about loving yourself as others love you and you love others, unconditionally.

We tend to negate the need to express love to ourselves, as there can be a discomfort in doing so.  It may feel selfish, stupid and ridiculous.  There may be the belief that feeling and expressing love is something you feel and do for and about others not yourself.

So pick one of the 5 people you listed above that YOU LOVE unconditionally. Feel what it feels like to love them.  Think of the reasons that love comes out of you to them without conditions.  Think about how the love you have for them provides them with comfort, warmth and support in all ways.  Feel what that feels like.

Pick one of the 5 people you listed above that LOVE YOU unconditionally.  Feel what it feels like to have someone love you that way.  Think about how the love they feel for you comforts, warms and supports you in a multitude of ways. Feel what it feels like to receive love.

Think about what it feels like to be doing something you love, work or play. Isn't it effortless?  Work may not feel like work when you love what you are doing, play may feel like play to the tenth power when you love what you are doing.

Think about being somewhere that you love.  Vacation destination, your home, your favorite restaurant, wherever.  Feels good to be there.

The core of us is Love and we can learn how to invite those feelings into us and about us and our life by using our feelings from above as templates.

Starting at our core.  

  

Reflection (Knowledge and Self Cultivation):

I would ask if it would be possible to be able to look at the culmination of your life experiences and lessons with more compassion?  Would the good times feel even better and the bad times less bad?  When we use love as our filter perhaps we would be able to see our life with more objectivity.

Nurture (Health and Family):

If we approached nurturing our body, mind and spirit with the essence of love would it be easier to make choices that supported ourselves?  What would it feel like to make healthy choices from a love perspective rather than self-recrimination?  Is it possible we could be more successful in achieving a healthy status?  

Gratitude (Wealth and Prosperity):

Being and feeling grateful, while infused with love may allow us to see a broader picture of what makes us abundant.  Love may gift us seeing our lives as being wealthy and prosperous in a broader way.  Is it possible that gratitude and love are actually conjoined?  Is it possible that sending love to all the things we are grateful for in our lives could create even more prosperity?

Community (Fame and Reputation):

Loving the worlds in which gather may better support who we are and who we are becoming.  If we were to communicate with ourselves in a loving way would it be possible we would send and receive communication with others differently?  

Love (Love and Relationships):

What would it feel like if you were committed to loving yourself as you do other important relationships?  How would that affect your marital relationship, that with your children, family and friends?  How would that impact the balances you feel in relationship?

Joy (Children and Creativity):

When you are doing something you love to do, in a place that you love, with people that you love isn't that like a good vibeage trifecta?  Happiness and joy are commodities that having more of would be life changing.  Finding things that bring you joy and doing them is showing love to yourself!  Make a go to happy list, and do the things that you love to do!

Spirit (Helpful people and Travel):

If we needed help from others and loved ourselves enough to ask for it or accept it, how would your life feel different?  When offering help to others in the spirit of love would it be easier for them to accept and to ask?  Choosing to see that giving and receiving help is an extension of giving and receiving love. How would that perspective change your go forward?

Flow (Career):

If the flow of our life was buoyed by love how would you be moving forward?  If we chose to find a way to love ourselves and our life, in all ways would it be possible that we could be gentler when we are feeling stuck?  Would the possibilities be easier to see if we sailed the waters feeling love?  How could the momentum of your life be improved by adding love?

In each of the above life areas, adding love to the perspective or essence improves the texture of how we may look at our life overall.  Whether we are looking at where we are coming from, where we are at this moment, and where we are intending to go to in the future.

Practising Self Love is exactly that, a practise.  By doing so we recharge our selves from within, so that we can radiate love from the inside out.  

My favorite reminder is.

This reminds me to be more gentle, to be more mindful, to be more connected to myself and when I do so, everyone in my life, everything in my life benefits.

Happy Valentine's Day.

P.S.

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